[the amazing GYPSY PXARGORINA tells your fortune by reading your IP address]

[PXARGORINA]

Your IP address is 54.159.124.79
Today is Saturday, August 19 2017
You will have a abominable day today
Bob the Hamster is in a position to need your help

Gypsy Pxargorina's predictions are based your IP address, the date, and her innate mystical ability to divine your future from them. Check back tomorrow for another reading.